Phone for Ransom
Start by looking at everything around the office. Pick up the boxing glove from the window ledge, and the bowling bowl from over near the rat hole. Open the closet door and you will discover some cheese, but it is not swiss cheese. Grab the big gun from your inventory and shoot the cheese. Now pick up some swiss cheese and place it at the rat hole. When talking to the rat, get Max to insult him, then have Sam ask about the rat's headache. Get Max to suggest hanging the rat out to dry, and you will eventually get your phone back. After the phone call from the Commissioner, head out of the office.
Walk down the street after Max, and talk to Specs along the way, to learn about Eye-Bo. Now head into the store and talk to Bosco. Make sure you find out about the munchkin terrorist, B-TADS, and the tear gas grenade launcher. Grab the cheese from the sale table, and take a copy of the Eye-Bo video from the stand to the left. Now talk to Whizzer about the videos. Try to leave the store, and you will find out some more about B-TADS. Put the cheese back on the table, then leave.
Head to the left, around behind your DeSoto. Grab the can of spray paint from the back of the other car, then get into your car for a drive. Crash into the back of a random car and you will slow down. Now grab your gun and shoot out one of the car's tail-lights. Use the megaphone to get them to pull over, then fine them for driving with a broken tail-light and you will receive $10,000. Now return to the office. Put the video in the VCR in your office. After the movie is over, take the video again, and head outside. Go back to Bosco's Inconvenience and give Bosco the money in exchange for the weapon, then leave the store again.
Knock Out the Poppers
Head back down the street and into Sybil's, which is across the street from your car. Talk to Peepers for a while, then open the closet and talk to Sybil. Now you need to knock out each of the hypnotised former child stars. You may as well start with the one right here.
Try punching Peepers with the boxing glove, but he can see you coming. Try using the bowling ball on him, but you have the same problem. Shoot him in the eye with the tear gas grenade launcher, then punch him to knock him out.
Outside on the street, try to shoot Specs with the tear gas, but it doesn't work because he's wearing glasses. Try to punch him, but he moves too quickly. Go back to your office building and use the spray paint on the graffiti out the front. Specs will then come to fix up his masterpiece. Head upstairs and look out the window. Drop the bowling ball on the Specs' head.
Go to Bosco's Inconvenience and try to shoot Whizzer, but B-TADS won't let you. Offer Whizzer the cheese, but he won't take it, and he also won't let you put it in his basket. Go to the restroom, then when Whizzer is occupied, quickly put the cheese in his basket. After he is knocked out by B-TADS, wake him up. A chase scene will begin - just dodge the crates so you get close to the van, then pull out your gun and shoot a rear tyre.
Brady Culture's "Home" for Former Child Stars
Look around and you will find some application forms. Try to put a form through the slot beneath the large monkey, but it will be rejected - it needs to be filled out correctly first. Get in your car and head back to the office. Walk straight over to Sybil's, and give her the form. You now have to undertake three tests to determine whether you have artificial personality disorder. The first test is an inkblot test, and helps to identify the first symptom, which is a random choice of either an obsession with money, or an obsession with fame. Select the following answers for an obsession with money:
- Pennies on the eyes of a dead mime
- An SUV crashing into an opulent mansion
- My uncle Louie's moth-eaten wallet
- Elephants at the New York stock exchange
- A debit card fed through a document shredder
Select the following answers instead if you need an obsession with fame:
- Susan Lucci holding an Emmy
- Pigeons on a the marquee at Mann's Chinese Theater
- An autograph written in Braille
- A cheering crowd of lanky albinos
- That blotchy thing a flashbulb does to your eyes
For the second test, which is free association, you need to respond to words spoken by Sybil. You need to display a violent reaction to either dentistry or hair styling. Listen to each of the words she says, and if it relates to your selected topic, try to shoot her with your gun; if not, just say a random word back to her.
In the third test, you need to walk through a dream sequence and identify key features. You must display a concern with either aging or marriage. If it is aging, select Max as your companion in the room, and place a birthday cake in the doughnut box. If it is marriage, select Sybil as your companion and place a wedding cake in the doughnut box. The other selections don't make any difference. You should now have a completed form. Head back to Brady Culture's "Home" and submit your application form again.
You will find yourself slowly delivering videos, in the same way Whizzer was earlier. As you walk past the cheese on the table, grab it to get knocked out. You will then find yourself in another dream sequence, where you need to destroy your intruder (Brady Culture). There are four Bradies to get rid of - start by turning off the light switch near the door, and removing the coat hanger from the television. Walk over towards the closet and when the door opens, use the bicycle pump to enlarge the rat. Finally, Try turning over the one-way sign on the wall, and you will notice it temporarily affects gravity. Stand underneath Max's floating head and shoot the sign with your gun, then use Max's head on the last Brady.
When you wake up, talk to Bosco, then go and visit Sybil. She will give you plans for a hypnosis blocking helmet. Give these plans to Bosco, but he is missing an antenna. Go up to your office and grab the coat hanger from the television, then give that to Bosco. Get in your car and you will head off to save Max.
The Final Showdown
Go through the door and you will automatically wear the helmet. After the Poppers start to attack, talk to them. You need to tell them "Become Brady Culture", "Worship Me", then "Attack Me" to complete the game.
After the introduction, talk to Max, then leave your office. Head east down the street and enter Bosco's Inconvenience. Talk to Bosco, and ask for the voice modulator, but it costs $1 million. Try to pick up the can of shaving cream, and a skinbody will appear and steal it. Leave the store and head west to your car. Get in and chase the rats. As you are driving, select the gun and Max will take the wheel. When you shoot at one side of the rats' car, it will swerve to dodge the bullet. Just make them swerve into the manhole in the middle of the road as it appears, and you will get the shaving cream. You will return to town automatically. Use the car again and drive to the studio.
Head to the right and talk to the director. When the audition begins, use the shaving cream on Sam, then use the tear gas grenade launcher on Max - you will get the parts. Head through the blue door to find the first set.
After the director tells you about the show, say "Let's start taping" to begin the scene. Pick up the lamp shade and put it on the cow. Philo will enter - say the cow is your chef. Now pick up the plate from the table and use it on the cowpie behind the cow. Say "Moo Goo Gai Pan" to the next question and you will finish the clip. Go through the right door to find the next set.
Cooking Without Looking
Talk to the director, then pick up the pot to start the show. Say that you are going to make a cake when you are asked. Select any of the flavouring ingredients, then click on the Cook It icon on the bottom left of the screen. You will end up with a cake. Go back to the previous set, and open the door on the far left.
After the performance, head right and pick up Peepers' lyrics from the apple crate. Go back to the previous studio and through the middle blue door.
Who's Never Going to be a Millionaire
Talk to Hugh Bliss and get him to show you a magic trick - make him turn green. Now take a photo with him. Go and talk to the director, then approach the left podium to start the game show. You will get the first question wrong. Go to the other podium and take the questions, then replace them with Peepers' lyrics. Go back to the left podium and answer the question with "No" to win lots of food stamps. Open the pink door to meet Myra - ask to come in, and then ask to be guests on the show. You need to bring her 3 items to get inside. Go back to the Embarrassing Idol studio and head through the exit door on the left.
Go back to Bosco's and use your cake on the condiments over on the left. Give your food stamps to Bosco and ask for the voice modulator. Now go to Sybil's (west from your car) and talk to her, then give her your photograph. Go back to the newspaper machines outside Bosco's and take a copy of the Alien Love Triangle Times. Drive to the studio again.
Use the microphone to try to win the show, but you only get one vote out of three. Give the cake to Whizzer and he will leave. Now use the voice modulator on Sam, then use the microphone again to win a recording contract. Head through Midtown Cowboys, into Who's Never Going to be a Millionaire. Open the pink door to talk to Myra again. Now say you have all 3 items she requires, and you will be invited to her show. Say you would rather relive your Embarrassing Idol glory, and you will sing a song. Use the voice modulator on sam, then pick up the banjo for another song. Talk to Myra again and talk about the picture in the Times - say someone else was involved, and it was Bessy the Cow.
Talk to Max, then pick up the ace of spades from next to the rat hole, then look at the rat hole to find out that Jimmy is dealing in stolen goods. Leave the office and go to Bosco's Inconvenience to learn about his listening device. Leave the store and get in your car to drive to the casino.
Talk to Lovey Bear at the entrance, and you will receive some free tokens. Head across the room and talk to the guard, who won't let you through the door without a password. Go back to the Whack Da Ratz game on the left and insert a token to play. Shoot the orange rats that pop up - if you get a high enough score you will win a magnet, and if not just keep playing the game until you do. Next, talk to Leonard Steakcharmer at the poker table. Play a game with him, but if he bets, just fold because you will lose. Note that before betting, he looks up behind you. Leave the table and throw your ace of spaces up at the clown's nose above the entrance. Play poker again, and this time bet against Leonard - you will eventually win his 10 million tokens. Leave the casino.
Head down the street and into Bosco's Inconvenience. Buy the listening device from him, then return to the casino.
Go over and use the bug on the guard by the far door. Now insert a token into the one-armed bandit - this will cause another guard to come out and go back through the door, saying the password on the way. Pick up your bug and you will learn the password. Talk to the guard and you will enter the back room. You will receive 3 tasks. Leave the casino again.
Lean on Somebody
Go to Bosco's Inconvenience and talk to the mafia guy outside until he says something to identify himself. Head inside and look at the blue camera near the entrance. Try to use your magnet on it, but Bosco stops you. Talk to Bosco and tell him the Toy Mafia is outside. While he is distracted, use the magnet on the camera, then put the box on the table near the entrance.
Enter Sybil's, on the other side of town. Talk to her, but she refuses to fake her own death. Pick up her coffee cup and return to Bosco's. Use the coffee cup on the condiments in the back of the store, then go back to Sybil's. Give the cup back to Sybil, then shoot the cup to fake her death.
Recover the Meatball Sandwich
Head into your office and talk to Leonard. Switch to Max during the conversation and you will start a series of jokes that you have to match up as follows:
- Fat: she has more folds than an origami accordion
- Radiant: if she fell in nuclear waste, no one would notice
- Perky: the only time she's low is at a limbo contest
- Thrifty: she brings coupons to the penny arcade
- Vulgar: her mouth would make a longshoreman blush
- Punctual: she showed up early for her own funeral
Once you correctly complete five insults you will get the cap gun and the arm from the one-armed bandit. Drive to the casino. Reattach the arm to the one-armed bandit, then insert a token to find the meatball sandwich.
After the cut-scene you will be driving your car. Get out the gun and shoot the sign that you drive beneath to make the car following you crash. Back at the casino back room, head through the door with the warning written on it. When you regain control again, shoot Max with the cap gun. Go left and take the screwdriver. Use the one-armed bandit to hear the phrase "You're on fire". Use the screwdriver on the one-armed bandit, then pick up the voice box. Put this into the orange hopper behind the machinery, and a defective bear will be created. Pick this up, and use it on the mole. After he runs across the room, pull the lever next to him to complete the game.
Pick up the boxing glove from next to the pool, then have a look around. In particular, look at the payphone to the right of the main entrance. Talk to the security guard, but he won't let you inside the White House. Hop in your car and drive to the office.
Head down the alley behind your car to see some posters. When one falls down, pick it up. Now head down the street to the right and talk to Hugh Bliss. Get him to show you a magic trick, then after he disappears, take his "Free Home Delivery" sign. Head up the stairs into your office. Listen to the answering machine messages, then pick up the phone and call Agent Superball. Tell him to hold, then drive back to the White House.
Since Agent Superball is still distracted, you can now head inside. Talk to the President, and say you are ready to interpret. Look around the room, and try to enter the War Room, but you will be ejected. At this point, Governor Whizzer will be escorted inside. Talk to the President when you get a chance, and select these options:
- We're ready to interpret.
- What's a guy gotta do to get a drink around here?
- Which way is the War Room?
Use the boxing glove on the president. After Abe Lincoln appears, go over and talk to him to start a debate between Lincoln and Max. When you talk to him about "the issues", Lincoln will use prepared speeches. Call for a time-out, and look at the cue cards. You need to replace his cue cards to get him to say the wrong thing and lose the election.
Religion and Schools
Look at the cue cards again and you will change to the second card, reading "two wrongs don't make a right". Now ask Lincoln about religion and schools.
Put your "Free home delivery" poster on the cue cards, then ask Lincoln about the problem of toxic waste.
Finally, put your "Give me all you got" poster on the cue cards, and ask Lincoln to describe his tax plan.
Use your organic listening device on Lincoln and a conversation will happen automatically. Pick up the listening device again (from the lectern in from of him) and also pick up one of his campaign flyers from the stage. Get back in your car to head to the office.
Cross the road and enter Sybil's, then talk to her - she is having trouble finding a date. Put the campaign flyer in her dating service box, then go up to your own office. Use the listening device on your phone, then call Sybil. Use the following options:
- I, Abraham Lincoln, am that man.
- This is a date that will be remembered for centuries...
- I stand here at the steps of the white house.
- The time to act is now.
You will now automatically go back to the debate.
Max will now win the election and become President of the United States. Go up to the office and have a look around. In particular, look at the national budget on the desk. Pick up the red Secretary ribbon from the desk, and look at the calendar - you can now change the official date. Leave the White House and go back to your office.
Visit Sybil and ask her about carbon dating and her financial problems.
Look at the budget again, and select Sybil Pandemik's Office from the list.
Visit Sybil's office - Sybil has now left on holiday, so you can take her carbon dating machine. Leave her office and head down the road into Bosco's Inconvenience. Talk to Bosco, who is now pretending to be Russian. Use your carbon dating machine on the hot weenies in the machine next to Bosco.
Look at the budget, and this time select Bosco's Inconvenience Store from the list.
Go back and visit Bosco again, and talk to him to get some truth serum.
Talk to each of the former child stars in the oval office, then give the truth serum to Whizzer. After the song and dance, look at the big calendar, and move the sticky note to set the current date to April 26 (Secretary's Day). Now give the red ribbon to Agent Superball, over in front of the War Room. Name him secretary of something, then tell him to take a vacation. Enter the War Room. Head around to the other side of the desk and read the war manual, then use the targeting computer. Fire a missile at everything you can, including Bosco's Inconvenience - his missile defence system works.
Go into Bosco's and look at the sale sign beneath the camera near the door. You will automatically take the targeting beacon. Now get in your car and chase Lincoln.
When you are driving along behind Lincoln, select the beacon icon and throw it at his back. Now head back to the White House.
Go through to the War Room and use the targeting computer to shoot a missile at Lincoln.
Head outside and down the street to Bosco's Inconvenience. Inside, talk to Bosco about the biological weapon - you need to pay for it online. Next talk to Jimmy the rat, who refuses to sell you his cannon. Try to take it, then quickly click on Jimmy when you get up, and you will get a rat cannon.
Next visit Sybil, who is playing an online game. Shoot her with the rat cannon and then talk to her about the COPS. Leave her shop and enter the building next door. Talk to the members of COPS and you will receive a chip to repair Sybil's goggles, as well as an extra pair for Max. Head back to Sybil's and put the chip in the broken goggles to enter Reality 2.0.
Try talking to Sybil, then try opening the closet door, but you can't for now. Leave her store and go down the street towards where you met COPS in the real world. Look at the jack-in-the-box at the end of the street - you can't pick it up because it is surrounded by pop-ups. Enter the Control Room.
Look at the computer on the right and you will press a button that disables pop-ups. Head outside and pick up the jack-in-the-box, then go back inside again. Press the button on the right computer again to turn pop-ups back on.
Next, look at the second computer from the right and learn that it controls your avatars' widths. Put your computer bug on this computer and you will become 2-dimensional. Leave the Control Room and go back to Sybil's. Now try to open the closet door and you will slide underneath and get a gold coin. Go back to the Control Room again.
Take the computer bug and put it on the telephone - you will shrink to a tiny size. Now go outside and head towards your office. You can't climb the steps because you are too small, so head back to reality (use the icon at the lower right of the screen). Head into your office, then use the goggles again. Enter the rat hole to get another gold coin. Return to reality again and leave your office, then back out on the street, use your goggles again. Return to the Control Room.
Finally, put the bug on the arcade machine to decrease gravity. Go outside and jump up to collect the three gold coins floating over near your car.
Continue right and talk to the Internet Wizard - ask him for a magic trick and he will give you a rainbow car paint kit. Next head into Bosco's and talk to him. Give him the 5 gold coins in exchange for a wooden long sword. Go left and look at the spawn point, and a menacing blue slime will appear. Use the long sword on the slime to start combat. Attack with the sword to defeat the slime, and you will pick up its remains. Head back outside and go towards Sybil's.
Talk to Auntie Biotic, who is protecting the mailbox - she has +1 armor so you cannot defeat her with your wooden long sword. Jump up on to Sybil's roof to get the +2 sword. Use the blue slime on the sword, then try to get it again. Head back down to the ground and attack Auntie Biotic. First defend with the jack-in-the-box, then attack with the +2 sword to defeat her.
Return to Bosco's and hit him with the +2 sword, then return to reality.
Talk to Bosco until you get the opportunity to say "Look behind you!". When he turns around, pick up his binoculars. Use them on Bosco to discover the password for his account: "Bosco". Now use your goggles again.
Get in your car and drive to Bancolavadero.com, but you will be stopped by a security gate. Watch a couple of cars go through successfully to note that their paint job matches their license plate. Return to the office area and use your rainbow paint kit on your car. Set the colors to blue, red and purple to match your BRP license plate. Now drive to Bancolavadero.com again and you will get through the barrier.
At the bank, click on Bosco's account and unlock it with the password "Bosco". Now you can redirect money through the accounts by clicking on the "cook the books" icons on the accounts. Move the money until all $1000 million are in Bosco's account. Go back to reality.
Visit Bosco and talk to him to get the biological weapon. Use your goggles one last time.
Put the computer disease in the mailbox that Auntie Biotic was previously guarding and you will crash the system.
Get the respect for living things, then go east and get Bosco's. Go west and northwest, and use Bosco's on the nauseating lake of cuteness, then go southwest and down, and use Bosco's on the corporate presence. Now get the respect for living things and go back up. Use the respect for living things on the internet.
Head into the visitor centre and look at each of the displays - you will get the bent spoon. Give this to Max, or you will have to return it as you leave the shop. Now head to the right and talk to Superball, who is guarding the entrance to the Blister of Tranquility. He won't let you in until you reach level red. Get back in your car and head back to Earth.
Go up to your office and take the coat hanger from the television. Head back outside and go to Bosco's. After talking to him, head left and put the unicorn in the microwave to turn its horn red. Go outside and talk to Jimmy the rat, who is sitting on the bent parking meter. He won't leave for now, so just return to your car and drive to the moon.
Go and talk to Superball, who will now let you inside. After Hugh Bliss gives his welcome message, talk to Abe Lincoln's head. Agree to help him with Sybil, then during the phone call select the following options:
- Just relax, baby.
- Lady, you a stone cold fox!.
- Play some one-on-one love hockey.
You will now get the gastrokinesis talisman - use it on Max to retrieve the display case. Talk to the COPS, who are developing a new computer game. Play the game and lose, and they will give you the lead vision talisman.
Leave the Blister of Tranquility and check out the lunar lander outside. Look at the lander door to see that it is locked, then unlock it with your coat hanger. You will take off and land again. Put the display case under the rocket engine, then use the lander key on the lunar lander to break the case. Now pick up the spoon bend talisman. Get into your DeSoto again.
Use the spoon bend talisman on the bent meter to get rid of Jimmy the rat. Get back in your car.
Return to the Blister of Tranquility, and head right to talk to Philo Pennyworth, who will give you his magician's hat. Get on the rainbow elevator to head up. Look through the intimidating door with your lead vision talisman, then quickly use the spoon bend talisman on the sconce to drop the bowling ball onto the button.
After the cut-scene, head back through the lead door to get down to the ground level. Use the spoon bend talisman on the giant spork over to the left, then head right to where the red Max is shooting. When he jumps on to the rollercoaster car, shoot the green button in front of it, and Max will get his hand back. Go outside and head right to talk to blue Max. He agrees to give the tail back, but you can't turn him over to get it. Get back in your car and head to Earth.
Head up to your office and look in the closet to see Leonard in the top shelf. Use your gastrokinesis talisman on him to get the Deed to the United States. Go outside and cross the road to enter Sybil's. Talk to her, and sell her the Deed for 100 trillion dollars. Leave Sybil's and go to Bosco's.
Give Bosco the money and he will give you the earthquake maker. Use your magician's hat, then give Jimmy to green Max. Use the hat again to get Max's stomach back. Head back to the moon.
Walk over to where blue Max is sleeping and use the earthquake maker to flip him over. Now take his tail to complete the original Max. Go into the Blister of Tranquility and get straight on the rainbow elevator to reach the Inner Sanctum. You will now find yourself trapped by Hugh Bliss in various magic situations that you need to escape:
- Rainbow Wheel of Death: Use the spoon bend talisman on the spoon above you, then use the magic talisman.
- Separate Your Bliss: Use the magic talisman, then use the saw on Hugh's head.
- Ticket to Oblivion: Use the magic talisman.
- Cleansing Bath of Annihilation: Use the magic talisman, then walk away.
- Rainbow Wheel of Death: Use the magic talisman, then walk away.
- Separate Your Bliss: Use the magic talisman, then use the saw on the lunar lander.
- Cleansing Bath of Annihilation: Use the magic talisman, then use the key on the lunar lander.